Hello everyone. I mentioned in my last blog post that while there have been highlights in the past month, there has also been some lowlights. And these have been really low lowlights.
I am not even sure what to say or how to say this.
My husband and I are currently in the process of getting a dissolution of our marriage. We are currently considering ourselves separated as we navigate this difficult familial situation.
We have told the kids and they are devastated as you could imagine. We are both committed to making this as amicable as possible for the kids and we are both committed to shared parenting. Our children will always come first.
He will be moving out in July. He has been approved for an apartment that is not too far from where we currently live.
I am currently looking for a full-time job and have been sending out resumes daily.
I don't want anyone to speculate about the whys and I will not be going into the whys on this blog. My daughter, my soon to be ex, and others that I know read this blog regularly and the things that caused us to separate are between us. I will just say that we have worked on our marriage for the last couple of years, including rounds of marriage counseling, and this is the solution that we have made for everyone affected.
I originally wasn't even going to post about this, but my life is about to change in a huge way, and I want to make sure that I can still document it. I am still going to be trying to live my life better one day at time. I am still going to be here, just with a different life than I thought I would have.
I've been praying for you. So, your entering a different life setting...I totally understand it [been there 2X]. It's hard in the beginning and the middle, but in the end you will find your Strong! I'm here as I'm sure others will be as well. Blog Hugs to you.
ReplyDeleteThank you! I also just responded to your email.
DeleteGood luck to you. Do you read The Frugal Girl? She went through this a year or so ago.
ReplyDeleteThank you Cheryl. I do read The Frugal Girl and have gone back to reread her posts over the last year.
DeleteBest of luck to you and your family as you navigate your new normal.
ReplyDeleteThank you Bobi!
DeleteWishing you the best outcome while you adapt to your changing situation.
ReplyDeleteThanks Anne!
DeleteWishing you all the best!
ReplyDeleteThanks angie!
DeleteDearest Friend,
ReplyDeleteYou are such a wonderful woman and mother. You are strong and will enter this next chapter of your life with that strength. Thank you for opening your heart here. We are here for you! Show yourself compassion. You deserve it!
Billie Jo, you are going to make me cry. Thank you.
DeleteI kind of guessed this was happening just based on your fb posts. I agree with Billie Jo that you are strong and will get through this. I heard a speaker last week talking about how endings become new beginnings. Sending you positive thoughts.
ReplyDeleteThanks Lorraine.
DeletePrayers for you during this difficult time
ReplyDeleteThank you.
DeleteI'm so very sorry to hear this, but I understand. I'm still dealing with things from my divorce more than a year later. It is a very difficult thing to go through. I'm praying that everything will go well for all of you. If I can give some friendly advice, please don't do this without an attorney. Also, please remember that attorneys bill for every single thing & every minute they spend dealing with your case, whether it's texts, phone calls, emails, etc. It can get expensive. Please remember that 'this too shall pass'. Wishing you all the best!
ReplyDeleteBelieve me, I am not doing this without an attorney. We are attempting to go the dissolution route, but the attorney that I am using would be available to go the divorce route as well if needed. I refuse to do the paperwork without legal counsel so that the kids are protected.
DeleteI'm so sorry to hear this. I went through a divorce at 65, when my (now ex)husband decided that he didn't want to be married any more. It certainly wasn't where I thought I would be when I said my vows thirty-odd years ago!! It was REALLY hard at first, and I did a lot of praying and crying, but it DOES get better. I and many others in your blog community will be praying for you and sending positive thoughts your way. Please let me know if you would like my email; I'd be happy to "talk" to you any time.
ReplyDeleteJackie in CA
I've been reading you for awhile, and it's obvious you are an excellent, devoted mother to those amazing kids. And as long as they know that they are loved by both you & their father, they'll be fine. The worst thing for the kids is to have to experience an ugly divorce. Wishing you lots of strength & courage as you continue forward. I know you are a woman of faith - keep praying - I know our Lord will walk by your side, giving you strength, direction & encouragement to continue down this new road. We are all here for you! ((( HUGS )))
ReplyDeleteThank you.
DeletePlease remember to show yourself lots of grace, love, and kindness during this period.
ReplyDeleteDuring transitional moments, I try to keep in mind of this quote from Winnie the Pooh, "You are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem and smarter than you think."
Wishing you and your family the best!
I love that Winnie the Pooh quote. Thank you!
DeleteLike so many things, just taking it one step at a time helps. Wishing you the very best. Ginger
ReplyDeleteThank you Ginger.
DeleteI am so sorry for the pain you and the children are experiencing. I hope they can keep up their accomplishments through all this. I actually expected this several years ago. You are doing an amazing job with your children. Do not use the same attorney as your husband!
ReplyDeleteI have my own lawyer. The kids, I think, will be okay once we get into a new normal. They will have 1.5 months of new normal before school starts and that will help with the transition.
DeleteHugs to you as you & your family navigate this.
ReplyDeleteThank you.
DeleteI am very sorry to hear this. It was very brave of you to post about it but I hope you know you have lots of support out here in blogland. Praying for you and your family as you navigate this new chapter in your lives and that you find much happiness in the future.
ReplyDeleteThank you Jean.
DeleteI was afraid of this and I am so sorry!! Its so difficult!! Jill
ReplyDeleteIt is really difficult.
DeleteI sure do hate to hear this, but I know you have been working on your marriage for awhile. Praying for all of you as you navigate your new normal. I know it will be tough. Also praying that a full time job comes through for you soon. You have my love and support from afar. As Cheryl mentioned above, Frugal Girl is a blogger who is going through a divorce as well, and she has some great posts about it. Take care. ((hugs))
ReplyDeleteThanks Mandy.
DeleteI’m sorry to hear this but in fact in time you and the kids will be fine, in fact better. It’s better to come from a “broken” home than live in one. I think your overall stress level will be so much better. And kids know things, I think the tension will be so much less which they’ll feel too. This is premature but have you ever considered going back to school? There is such a need for LPN’s which can be done in one year at a tech school and if you’re lower income there are so many programs and grants for that and being a single parent. Your pay and benefits would be made up within a couple of years. I’m a RN and nurses can always find a job. Best wishes for you, you’ll be ok (although very different I was widowed at 40 with 4 kids the youngest turned 5 that week, we made it and have had a great life, I’m 69 now with 13 grandchildren).
ReplyDelete